Recently I’ve caught the DIY bug. Not sure exactly how I caught it. I hear it can be sexually transmitted through semen. So maybe that’s how I contracted it. Oh, or Pinterest. Yeah, that’s more probable.
I’ve always been a crafty / home decor / creative type of gal. After spending so much time in my home from my WEEK LONG SICKNESS I decided my living quarters needed a change. I like to think I keep my home pretty adorable decor wise but the all white walls and cheap carpet started getting to me. I would normally jazz up my space with vintagey flair to add a little character but it just needed something.
And so it began. I stalked Pinterest and home makeover blogs. I drooled over mis-matched patterns and geometric shapes. I came home and declared to my husband “Oh my god, I’m going to repaint our kitchen table and chairs, stencil the walls, buy new rugs, and new curtains! Oh, And we’ll need a staple gun for the reupholstering. Do you have a power sander? We’ll need one of those, too.” Are you excited? ARE YOU EXCITED?!!!”
He dare not say no to my ideas. We have a Man Cave in the basement for all of his nerd decor and movie posters so there’s a mutual unspoken agreement that the rest of the house is my domain. Why would I let him decorate anyway? His tastes are rather, ummmm, different than mine.
So he’s on board with all of my endeavors but I think a little scared. I’m a bit, okay REALLY clumsy. I’ve also vowed to change all of the lightbulbs in the house to Daylight bulbs for that extra bright feel. What could go wrong there?
I’ve researched the rules of curtain size, rug size, how to make rooms appear larger, how to make Leonardo DiCaprio want to bang me… oops that was a different search. ANYWAYS what I’m saying is I’m ready to learn. I’m ready to give our little townhouse more personality. I want guests to walk into our living room and instantly fuck the couch. THAT’S how amazeballs my vision is.
I also know I’ll have to learn from my mistakes. I may buy new things and then realize I don’t like them. Stuff may get broken out of frustruation. I may trip over a cord and land on a pile of nails. I may get addicted to huffing spraypaint and hallucinate that I’m on The Price is Right with my pet hamster playing the role of Drew Carey. I’m willing to take that risk.
So be warned. I MAY be posting tutorial-type blogs on here but not to worry, they’ll be sprinkled with humor kind of like my pumpkin mutilation tutorial from back in October. I’ll post my triumphs, I’ll post my fails, and I’ll continue to of course give you random witty stuff.
Wish me luck on all of my ideas. Pray that I don’t lose a finger or fall off a ladder. And to anyone who doesn’t like my style please refer Walter White below.