Fits of Wit

Step Aside, Robins. This is the REAL Sign of Spring.

Spring is around the corner! How do I know? Well, I could talk about how the snow in my area has been melting. The temperature is FINALLY above 30 degrees! Or it could be that I spotted a Robin the other day. Everyone knows that seeing a Robin is the first sign of spring, right? WRONG. There is another theory I stand by that proves spring is fast approaching.

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I believe that winter’s ass is kicked out by the flip flop of the white man. Scientists have not proven my theory to be accurate yet, but it’s only a matter of time. In fact, I think we should leave groundhogs the fuck alone. Let them sleep. On February 2nd pull a white man out of a bar. If he’s wearing boots or sneakers with his jeans, we have several weeks of winter left to go. If he’s wearing flip flops, spring is just around the corner.

jeans 1

Last year around this time I discussed another epidemic of springtime here. I’m an observer. It’s what I do. But how do I prove my theory? By Scientific Observation of course…

The Scientific Process

A scientific process or scientific method requires observations of nature and formulating and testing the hypothesis. It consists of following four steps.

  1. Observe something and ask questions about a natural phenomenon (scientific observation)
  2. Make your hypothesis
  3. Make predictions about logical consequences of the hypothesis
  4. Test your predictions by controlled experiment, a natural experiment, an observational study or a field experiment
  5. Create your conclusion on the basis of data or information gathered in your experiment.

I NEED YOUR HELP, READERS! In order to make my theory valid we need to experiment. We need research. We need data. I cannot be the only person to go out and observe white men wearing jeans and flip flops. This week count the number of white men wearing flip flops with jeans. Record your number and email your data to me at fitsofwit@gmail.com. Tell me where you live, the average temperature this week, and how many white men wearing jeans with flip flops  you’ve spotted. Do it for spring. Do it for science. But most of all, do it because it will entertain me.

flip flops 3

 

*** Gifs found at giphy.com

13 Comments

  1. Jessie Reyna

    I would love to partake buttttt, I think living in an area where it’s 70 degrees everyday might ruin the science. Can’t wait to see the results 🙂

    Reply
    1. FitsofWit

      You can still partake, Jess. I am curious to know if it’s only in states that are thawing out OR maybe temperature has nothing to do with it. Maybe it’s in the white mans DNA to sport this trend when it nears Spring. Like a primal fashion faux pas.

      Reply
  2. Mark Petruska

    I go out walking on my lunch every day, and it’s been pushing 70 lately. Count me in! I’ll report back in a few days.

    Reply
    1. FitsofWit

      Your contribution will be another step towards making this observation into fact. Look out, science books.

      Reply
  3. annieemmy

    Bwahahahaha… I am TOTALLY doing this. Although… I don’t think ANY men in my area would be caught wearing flip flops… but there’s always the unusual tourist or college kid, so I’ll keep my eyes open. 🙂

    Reply
    1. FitsofWit

      I’m keeping a notebook with me and making a check mark for each sighting. #gatheringdata

      Reply
  4. Spoken Like A True Nut

    I maintain that Vancouver didn’t get a winter this year. Not only did the robins never actually leave, but I saw at least half a dozen white males wearing flip flops with jeans around town during the month of December, let alone this week.

    Reply
    1. FitsofWit

      Those damn white Vancouver males. Ruining my experiment.

      Reply
  5. White Girls Be Like

    I haven’t seen any flip flops yet, but yesterday went up to 52 degrees so every teenager was outside being loud in shorts and tank tops. That’s how I know it’s officially Spring in central PA

    Reply
  6. Vanessa-Jane Chapman

    I’m not sure that jeans and flip flops is a common choice here in England, but I will certainly look out for it – we got up to the low 60s at the weekend, pretty impressive right? If I find a jean and flip flop situation going on, I’ll be sure to let you know.

    Reply
  7. JunkChuck

    Spring? I thought the flip flop thing was a sign of the Apocalypse. My bad.

    Reply
  8. pieterk515

    I’m a man. And yes it is true. Flip-flops or board shorts, even if you’re not a surfer. And let’s not forget the vest!

    Reply
  9. Pingback: I prefer my men not dressed as tampon wrappers | Fits of Wit

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